Not An Ordinary Day At Work..........

The phone rings and I answer it.  It's my son calling to say he's home from school and that he got in to some trouble at school.......again..........after a few words I tell him that I love him and we hang up.  Lord, what are we to do here?  What are we missing?  A little while later my daughter Bethany calls and wants to go play at her friends house.  She had been there a lot playing after school lately so I said no, told her where I had the snacks set out for them and that I loved her.

The phone rings and I answer it........it's my son again and he's telling me something that I just cannot wrap my mind around.  Something like "I shot Bethany?"  No way!  My mind tells me he's just teasing, but my heart sinks as I know it's true.  I can hear it in the tone of his voice.......... 

What do you with a day like that?  You have just received some unimaginable news.  Right here...... NOW is where you react with what is within you.  The question is now what is in you that is going to sustain you through over ten years of snowballing disaster?  In my case I lost what I valued the most.....my children.  One in death, one to lock-up for five years, one to drugs and alcohol addictions. 

Oh, the losses didn't stop there.  Five years later my sweet Mother was diagnosed with brain cancer right before her Birthday in September and she went to her Heavenly home in February.  My marriage could not sustain the pressure and it ended for two years.  I had lived in chaos for over ten years and I had a very over the top tired body.  There was one day I was ready and prepared to take my life.

God doesn't just allow tragedies to ravage our lives.  Because of what was in me (God's promises) I knew there was more coming besides the pain.  That's what stopped me from taking my own life.  God impressed his truth in me that day.  "You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world."  I John 4:4 (NIV)

Through all the pain and the ravaging God would send snippets of joy, laughter and renewed hope through many vessels.  Looking back I can see God's hand in every single detail.  Even now I can feel his love and his leading me to new and challenging walks..........."Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send?  And who will go for us?"  And I said, "Here am I.  Send me!"  Isaiah 6:8 (NIV)

I am so thankful that I have the walk with God that I do.  Every day I want my prayer to be, "God open a door of opportunity to be a blessing to someone today even when I don't feel like little Mary Sunshine.  Open up my heart to let the peace that is always there come flooding out and in to the hearts of those who need their peace restored and they need it today!  Do not allow me to become a stumbling block to those I've judged to have it all together.  I desire you to use all of my pain to be a sacrifice.  I surrender it to you Lord to be an example of who you are in me and what you can do to make a difference in the lives of many.  Everyday change my way of thinking to your way of thinking, my seeing to your seeing, my heart to your heart.  Cleanse my heart, mind and soul of anything that is not of you.  "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."  Psalm 51:10

Every day is a new day.  Each day will hold opportunities to be a blessing and a chance to sew some faith and seeds of hope.  I challenge you on this day to start going out and making a difference.  Do it wounded......don't wait until..........the until's will always be there.  Then I would ask one thing.  Come back here and share the stories.  I can positively tell you from my own experience that if you're operating wounded, through helping somebody else you will be getting some healing.  It's so freeing to be used by God to spread some joy!!!!

Walking by Faith,

Deb